a change... for life

so i have been pretty quiet on my blog lately, not because i have nothing to say, but because i have been doing, instead of saying for the last while.  so much has happened both good and bad, but ultimately all good i suppose since all things work together for good for those who follow Jesus and that includes me...

i realised that while i was happy with my life, i was also being more of a spectator than a participant, and so i have started to do, not just say i want to do, but actually do

i have started exercising, which i know many people do every new years for a month or two, but i have never been much of a new years resolution girl, i am much more "make a resolution and keep it, or don't make it" girl, so not a new years thing, a lifestyle thing

in keeping with the get healthy to live my life attitude, i have cut out almost all sugar, most fat, and my beloved creamer for my coffee....

a step i swore i would never ever take, and i gotta say the first few days drinking coffee with milk and splenda,
 i was glad i was a ~ get it done, to stubborn to quit girl,

 because the creamer called, crooned, sang, whispered and finally really screeched

~but i resisted~

and after awhile i got used to the new coffee, it was not as tasty, not as creamy, not as sweet, but it was still hot and filled with caffeine, and while whole milk is not international delight, it was sorta creamy

and i noticed two things right away
i lost 9 pounds in one week
and i felt ~better~
the coffee with all the creamy sugary gunk in it was supposed to be a treat to start my day
and it smelled like one
and it felt like one in the warm cup on cold hands
and it tasted like one
but there was something i didn't see about it while i was drinking it
it made my queasy
it made me slower
it took the place of breakfast
and
it made me fat
which made me slower
and grumpy
i found it hard to play with my kids
i didn't want to sit on the floor
i didn't want to chase them
i didn't want to go for a walk
i was always tired

just a few days without this thing i thought was vital to my existence and i felt
better
faster
hungry, for actual food
i felt like chasing my babies
i sit on the floor with them to read a book
i bought an elliptical, well i should say my husband bought me an elliptical because he always encourages me in what i want to do, always wants to see me succeed

and i started using it

every single day

i have missed one day since i got it, yesterday, when i decided scrubbing the house was a good enough workout

i started eating fresh food
i have always fed it to the kids, they love veggies and fruit
i never ate it myself because it is so expensive
but i have decided that i am important
to my husband
to my kids
to my sister
to my friends
and to Jesus
and i need to take care of me

i was feeling very good
and so i upped the anty
i switched from whole milk to 2% in my coffee
i now drink tea
but i love tea so it really isn't a hardship
i will never go back to the creamer
because i now see the international delight for what it is
a stealer of my life

i choose life
and i have lost 20lbs